The Best Advice I Got from Another Mom (and the Worst)

Because some advice changes your life… and some just makes you cry in the pantry.

One of the most beautiful parts of motherhood is how other moms show up for you. They share snacks, strollers, and survival stories. And let’s be honest—they share a lot of advice, too. Some of it makes you feel seen and supported. Some of it makes you want to scream into a burp cloth.

Over the years, I’ve collected both kinds. Here’s the advice I’ll never forget—and the one I wish I had forgotten the second it left her lips.

The Best Advice: “You’re the mom they need, not the mom you think you should be.”

I was standing in the baby aisle, overwhelmed and under-rested, debating between two brands of wipes like it was a life-or-death decision. A mom next to me saw the panic in my eyes and said quietly, “It’s okay. You’re the mom they need. You already are.”

That moment stuck with me like glue.

In a world that bombards us with ideal images of motherhood—on social media, in books, even at drop-off lines—it’s easy to feel like we’re not measuring up. But that advice reminded me that I don’t have to be anyone else. I don’t need to parent like her, or plan like Pinterest, or pretend everything’s perfect.

My kids need me—the mom who shows up. The one who apologizes when she yells. The one who gives hugs in the chaos. The one who doesn’t always get it right, but never stops trying.

The Worst Advice: “Don’t ever let your baby nap on you or you’ll regret it.”

Let me just say… I did not regret it.

That advice came with good intentions, I’m sure. But it was rooted in fear, not love. I was a brand-new mom with a baby who only slept if she was curled on my chest like a warm loaf of bread. I tried the schedules, the routines, the sleep training—and then I gave up and just held her.

And guess what? She grew up anyway.

She doesn’t nap on me anymore. She runs, talks back, and leaves Goldfish crumbs in my bed. I would give anything to go back and soak up just one more sleepy cuddle without worrying about what it meant long-term.

So if you’re in the thick of it and someone tells you you’re “spoiling” your baby by loving them too much? Smile politely and go do what feels right. There’s no expiration date on connection.

What I’ve Learned Since Then

  • Some advice will light your path.

  • Some advice will weigh you down.

  • It’s okay to ignore what doesn’t fit your child, your values, or your mental health.

You are allowed to parent from a place of peace, not performance. And you’re allowed to change your mind, try something new, or trust your gut over Google.

So Tell Me, Mama…

What was the best (or worst) advice you ever got from another mom? Drop it in the comments or bring it up at our next playdate—because learning together is what makes this journey feel a little less lonely.

And if no one has told you today: you’re doing an amazing job—even if you didn’t follow a single piece of advice in that parenting book you bought.